I drove down on my motorcycle the day before, taking a backroads route that lead me through Hollister and Coalinga, and then on through Interstate 5. Beautiful drive, but it takes a bit out of you, and there was some concern about whether I'd be able to rally for the fest the next day.
Well, when Danny and Chris and I got to the conference the following morning, I was feeling pretty good. I'd slept well, and I'd gotten a charge out of seeing my old friends, and then in the registration area they had beers on tap, and the first beer to hit my tongue (at 10 a.m. on a Thursday morning) was an incredible lager that might have been the best beer I'd ever had in my life (and normally, lagers aren't really my favorite type of beer). Then Danny found a way for me to get on the Volunteer list with him, which made it possible to get in to certain seminars I'd been wanting to see (but had been too cheap to pay for). Things seemed to be going so well that I was starting to feel giddy.
And geezus, all the beer didn't exactly put one in a sober mood, either. There were literally thousands of different beers available during the three days of the conference, all for free, from professional breweries and amateur brewclubs alike.
Really, it started hitting me while I volunteered in Randy Mosher's seminar. Randy is the author of my favorite brewing book (RADICAL BREWING), and his seminar was sort of a travelogue of visits to breweries all over the world. He brought along sample beers too, so that the people in the audience could drink what he was talking about. As a volunteer it was my job to help pour samples of those beers. There were seven samples for an hour long presentation--at least three of which were incredibly good--and I made sure to pour my self one of each (after pouring for everyone else, of course). I was rolling by the end of it.
Fortunately, the next seminar I wanted to attend was a drier event--Christ White of White Labs yeast was giving a talk on different yeast strains, and he didn't bring any sample beers. It gave me a chance to clear the alcohol haze out of my head, and to fill it with a fog of information instead.
After that seminar I took off my volunteer shirt, transforming to "civilian mode," and met up with Chris and Danny for more free beers out on the back patio. It was a beautiful evening, with all the beer you could drink, and how can you say no to that?
By the time they opened the main ballroom for the Professional Brewers Night, which featured free beer from dozens of different breweries, I was in the danger zone. Danny and Chris grabbed a table, and I made a point of anchoring myself there for a while, only going for samples every ten minutes or so. But if I was trying to pump the brakes, Danny was rolling full steam ahead, and Chris was gung ho going for it. I must have seen them drink 50 samplers each. And all my caution turned out to be for naught--I was a wreck when I got home that night.
Poorly rested and slightly queesy, I wanted to take it easy the next day, and did. Chris hit it hard right from the start, showing up at the conference at 8 in the morning, and staying and drinking all day long. I'd already seen the seminars I wanted to see, so I caught a ride with Danny toward the latter part of the day, in order to attend the Amateur Brewers night.
If the Pro Brewers' Night had been impressive, the Amateur Brewers' Night was positively mind-boggling. Brew clubs set up all around the same ball room the Pro Breweries had occuppied the night before, and they had outrageous setups and dozens of taps pouring every imaginable type of beer for free. Toward the end of the night they awarded the Golden Urinal to the homebrew club that brought the most kegs, and the winner this year was San Diego based QUAFF, with 160+ kegs (or some ridiculous number like that). I limped along, trying a beer here and a beer there, but I wasn't really in the condition to take advantage of the situation, or to fully appreciate what I was drinking. Danny and Chris, on the other hand, were making the most of it. If Chris drank 50 tasters the night before, this night he must have drank 100. I have no idea how he processes so much beer. The scientists should study him!
On the bright side, I didn't end up such a wreck that night. Still, I'd reached my limits, and skipped out on the conference all together on the last day. I know Danny went for the Banquet at the end of the day, and Chris, for the second day in a row, was there at 8 am, with sample glass in hand.
In the end, the main thing I took away from the experience was the thought "Geezus, that's a lot of beer!" And then, on the ride home, I crashed my motorcycle up near Hollister, and ended up in the emergency room. Sorry to say it, but this year's National Homebrew Conference really kicked my ass.
